Thursday, February 18, 2016

Somebody almost walked off with all of my stuff (For Colored Girls)

As many times as I’ve heard this poem. It moved me like never before at this point in my life. I almost lost it all. I almost made the choice to lose it all. I almost gave another total control of my future. I almost allowed him to walk away with my sanity, my self worth, and my life. I became unrecognizable and yet God was doing so much in my life.Taking me to world platforms, opening great and effectual doors and taking my gifts before Kings and yet I was casting my pearls before swines. He was so broken and I thought I could save him but in the end both of us needed to be saved. So often we give so much of our self to one person till there's nothing left for you and you realize you gave some body all your stuff they didn't even have to take it. This is not the full poem I shortened it and personalised it. 
Hope it inspires someone to get your stuff back!

Somebody almost walked off with all of my stuff (For Colored Girls)
***I personalised and added my own name
Somebody almost walked off with all of my stuff
And didn't care enough to send a note home saying I was late for my solo conversation
Or two sizes too small for my own tacky skirts
What can anybody do with something of no value on
a open market?
did you get a dime for my things?
hey man
Did you get a dime for my things?
Hey man, where are you going with all of my stuff?
This is a woman's trip, I need my stuff
Honest to God! Somebody almost ran with all of my stuff
And I didn't bring anything but the kick and sway of it
...and none of it is theirs
This is mine...Taffy L.Gotora 's own things,...
That's my name now give me my stuff
I see you hiding my laugh and how
I gotta have to get to my choice
So you can't have me unless I give me away
And I was doing all that till you ran off on a good thing
And who is this you left me with? A bad attitude
I i wants my things I want my arm wit the birth mark
& my leg with the bike burns
i want my calloused feet & quik language back in my mouth
I want my own things how I love them
stealin my stuff from me
dont make it yrs
makes it STO…LEN
somebody almost run off wit all of my stuff!!
& i was standin there
looking at myself
the whole time & it wasnt a spirit who took my stuff
It was a man who's ego won't drown like road ants shadow
It was a man faster than my innocence
It was a lover I made too much room for almost ran off with all of my stuff
And i didnt know I’d give it up so quick
And the one runnin wit it
don’t know he got it
And i’m shoutin this is mine
And he dont know he got it/
my stuff is the anonymous ripped off treasure of the year
did you know somebody almost got away wit me?
me in a plastic bag under their arm
me
danglin on a string of personal carelessness
i’m spattered with mud & city rain
And no i didnt get a chance to take a douche
hey man!
this is not your prerogative
i gotta have me in my pocket
to get round like a good woman should
Why dont your find your own things
And leave this package of me for my destiny
I’m the only one that
can HANDLE it
Somebody almost ran off with all of my stuff
And I was standing there looking at myself the whole time
Did you know somebody almost got away with me!
Me! in a plastic bag under his arm, Me!Taffy L.Gotora!
Somebody almost walked off with all of my stuff!

Thursday, December 24, 2015

My First publication is available online!!!!

Christmas Without You- Coping with grief at Christmas





Christmas is a time of mixed feelings for those who are missing someone they love. As we gather with family and friends, the absence of a loved one
may be felt even more intensely. Whether it’s a parent or partner who has left the family or a loved one who has died, you may be left feeling out of step with the jolliness of the season and the carols. It is especially important at this time to take care of yourself and those around you who have also experienced significant loss or change .

It's important to remember that not everyone is surrounded by large wonderful families. Some of us have problems during the holidays and sometimes are overcome with great sadness when we remember the loved ones who are not with us. And, many people have no one to spend these times with and are besieged by loneliness.

While some people keep busy to distract themselves others prefer to withdraw to their memories and reflections there is no right or wrong way to act or feel.I remember the first Christmas after my mum went to be with the Lord exactly a year after my dad's passing. I had my two little nieces over and was determined that they would have the best Christmas ever. Christmas day arrived and I felt so depressed and could not even get up from my bed because I was suddenly overwhelmed by grief. Fortunately my older sister came over and she later on took over the cooking and entertaining of the kids because I was now a basket case.Generally mothers are the hub of a time like Christmas and their departure can mean the end of some of the activities, i believe the same applies to children who pass away, their parents may find occasions like Christmas difficult because children are at the centre of Christmas celebrations.

Here are some pointers that might help you manage your grief feelings over Christmas

1.Do something to remember the person you are missing, play their favourite music, go to a place they loved or do something you used to do together, write them a Christmas card, share memories and stories with others who loved them. If the kids are missing the person involve them and ask how they would like to remember their loved one

2.Accept Help.If you feel like you are not coping reach out to people you trust and say yes to support or company

3.Give yourself permission to do less, people will understand if you do not bake cookies for everyone or if you miss a few parties.The most important thing is taking care of yourself and those around you.

4.Start new traditions, my parents were staunch Anglicans and attended Christmas mass but I do it differently with my daughter.

5.If a family has been split through divorce or separation, Christmas day may become a logistic struggle for the children who now have two places to be.Make this easier for them by including them in plans ahead of time and making the transition as smooth as possible and do your best to avoid competition over time spent with the children or size or expense of gifts.

6. Let yourself have fun, If you are feeling happy go with it- it does not mean that you are forgetting or forsaking the who is not there.

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ."- 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

PRIDE IN MY ROOTS



Many of those who are African have the iniquity of idolatry, sorcery and many other evil things in their ancestral lineage. As a result, the focus tends to be on the negative to the neglect of the positive traits of our genealogy which are for our good and favour! David took time to find out his genealogy and used that as an advantage to save his parents from Saul in 1 Samuel 22:3 “And David went from there to Mizpah of Moab; and he said to the king of Moab, Let my father [of Moabite descent] and my mother, I pray you, come out [of Judah] and be with you till I know what God will do for me.” David’s ancestor Boaz had broken the cultural norm and regulations and married Ruth the Moabitess and David grabbed that piece of history to his advantage.



A positive trait I have found out from my lineage and tribe is the aspect of leadership and influence. Like David, I have wisely taken that legacy for myself and taken my place of leadership and influence. The Mhofu (Eland) clan was the first clan to acknowledge and treat daughters on an equal level with their brothers and so Chihera women were included at the family dare (decision making meeting) , problems would emanate when they married into different tribes where women were not on an equal footing and trouble would arise in the marriage. Our clan chief Hwata Chiripanyanga in 1892, played a leadership role in the First Chimurenga war of Southern Rhodesia in June 1896. He worked with Nehanda Nyakasina to organise resistance by the Hwata people against British settlers who had invaded their lands at PaGomba in Mazoe valley. Hwata lost the lives of 100 fighters in guerrilla type battles with British settlers. He surrendered together with Mbuya Nehanda and both were executed in 1898 for their participation in the war.The Hwata people who are my ancestors endured the brunt of the Second Chimurenga, the war of liberation that finally defeated the white rulers of Southern Rhodesia. Many Hwata youths took up arms to participate in the war of liberation between 1973 and 1979 which brought independence from British rule on 18 April 1980.Today if you look at most women in key positions and running successful businesses or in leadership in the church in Zimbabwe are from this Vahera clan of the Mhofu totem. I am from the Chihera clan of the Mhofu totem and proud that God planned and designed that I come from such a clan. ‪#‎proudlyChihera‬

ABOUT LOVE.....


I have loved and lost
I have trusted and been betrayed,
I have believed in people and been deceived and taken advantage of
I have experienced the pain of unrequited love
I have experienced the broken heart countless times,
The wrenching emptiness and the pain and horror of rejection,
I have let my guard down for the wrong men and built walls around my heart and missed on opportunities because I would not let some good people in.
I have loved men who didn’t share my love for God, and have split my heart.
I have believed in a lie that my worth was based on my looks and popularity, and have split my soul.
I have made decisions not in line with what God’s ways, and have split my mind.
I have pursued love in the wrong places because I didn’t feel whole alone, and have split my strength.
But I STILL BELIEVE IN LOVE BECAUSE GOD IS LOVE!!!!
" Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things, LOVE NEVER FAILS- 1 Corinthians 13:7-8

Thursday, August 06, 2015

TRIBUTE TO A TRUE ZIMBABWEAN PATRIOT AND NATIONAL HERO


Its exactly 6 years since you were taken from us but in our hearts you still live. The rest of the people remember you as a visionary leader who was once the Vice-President of Zimbabwe but I remember you as the nephew who loved me and honoured me and never ever called me by first name. I remember you living with us for a while because our farm was closest to your farm and because you were hiding away from the Gukurahundi ordeal which affected you and your family and resulted in your Bulawayo house burning and your dear wife being seriously injured in the fire. I remember arguing with you then that there could be no possible way I could be your mother since you were old and had a beard and I wasnt even in school. But now I look in retrospect maybe you saw a bit of your late mother in me since she was my tete and from my bloodline or maybe you saw the greatness in me that I didnt see then or maybe you just respected the fact that I was your maternal aunt regardless of our age difference.
The day you took me on a day trip in the helicopter with other cabinet members is forever etched in my heart. I was in high school then and you called my dad to say you wanted to take your mum (me) along with you to see you at work. I sat and mixed with high profile politicians; even ate what they ate as well and I was only 15 or 16 I think, all because of you. I was even more excited when saw myself on TV in the news when they were reporting about the trip. When you invited me to ride in the presidential motorcade with you at a family gathering that also caused jealousy even among grown up relatives who wanted the same honour. I even became apologetic and would go and sit in the background at your family functions to avoid the outrage but you would still single me out and take me to the high table and shout at them saying "why are you seating her with the commoners when she is my mother." I am certain they were just as baffled as I was at why you were ordering them to wait on a mere child. When I went on the helicopter trip with you I had all the other ministers calling me "Amai" 'mother'as well and being respectful to me because of you, You would proudly introduce me as your mother to your other peers and always affirmed me.I had no accolades , I wasnt rich, I was a cocky kid but the excitement and pride you took in introducing me still moves me to tears. Later on when I was older and I visited your state residence with my friends I remember you spicing up the helicopter story to my friends and you telling them that I had been on a plane with you.
You even allowed me to grill you about the land invasions. When the landgrabbing started you ordered the war vets to get off the farms and then retracted the statement and you explained to me that " had you ordered the war vets off civil war could have started and the west would have said look at those savages killing each other.You even shared your concerns about the manner in which the farms were taken and how they were being distributed. You even stood up for many white farmers who were unfairly treated. You were about upholding peace and justice, each morning you woke up and saw your wife's scars from Gukurahundi and went to work - to work with the very people who caused your wife's scars because you understood that not everything was about you, because you had given yourself to this nation. Not many people knew how principled you were and did not like your family to have an 'entitlement mentality' expecting favours and short cuts because of you. You would always say "endai kuri kuenda vamwe' "just apply for it like everyone else , follow the due process" Not many people knew that the farm you had in Concession you didnt grab it from anyone you bought it after independence, Not many people knew that you only had one house in Harare and another in Bulawayo in your constituency. Not many people knew that you gave your life to the Lord at an Action Conference at Hear the Word Church(Celebration Church). Not many people knew that you were a staunch Anglican and that you were inducted as a lay-reader in the church meaning that you were effectively a sub deacon and could conduct mass in church should the priest be absent.Not many people knew that you were also the patron of St Albans Anglican Mission School in Chiweshe where you were born and bred. They knew you as Bruno, Mlambo, Dziva, the Honourable Vice President. I knew you as my nephew, mwana wangu, mwana wavatete vangu. I remember your love and respect for me and I remember your love and dedication to this beautiful nation. I have committed myself to play my part in whatever way I can in bringing about the Zimbabwe you envisaged so that when I see you again in God's glory you can show me off again.

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Lesson learned through giving


                                                                  

When I was in hospital after my C-section in Mbuya Nehanda Maternity Home I witnessed mothers who lived in abject poverty and would not even have clothes for their newborn so I started giving away some of what I had for my own baby even though at that time I was not working and had nothing. I was literally living on handouts and assistance from friends and not even sure how I was going to provide for my baby after we were discharged from the hospital.

It pained me to see some people did not even have cotton wool for the post natal bleeding ...I then immediately understood why I had been in that situation so I shared the little I had. I gave away some clothes and wrappers and cotton wool and even shared food that my family and friends would bring me because some of the people did not get visitors at every session and I had visitors at every slot and they always brought food and more clothes.

Because I am an orphan I did not get a lot of help from most relatives except for a few family members. Most people who helped me were friends and most of them were not at all wealthy.So I gave away what I had after realizing that we are all conduits of God's blessings no matter how much we get.

You too are a channel of love, you don't have to be Bill Gates to change a life. The little you do will go a long way.You can even start with extended family then the church through giving of alms and then proceed to other charities.

"The Lord Jesus himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive. "- Acts 20:35

Thursday, November 27, 2014

THANKSGIVING 2014


1. I am grateful for my relationship with God. He has never left or forsaken me.
2. I am grateful for the honour of being a mum to my Nyasha Grace. Just when i feel down she just has to smile or give me her random hugs n kisses and suddenly nothing else matters.
3. I am grateful for the ability to write. for me writing is therapeutic and helps me confront my personal issues. I. have suffered a lot of tragedies in my life including surviving rape at age 4 and sexual molestation and so I write with the intention to help others heal and overcome their issues
4. I am grateful for my parents Fanwell and Mavis Gotora. Even though they are no longer alive they left a rich legacy of love and faith that I continue to harvest from.The one outstanding thing about my mum is the odds she had to overcome. By the time she met my dad my mum was a single mum in the 1960's but she had her life organised. she had taken out mortage and owned a property and she was driving and doing well in her nursing career! My dad must have been a really confident man to have married such a strong succesful woman. He loved my mum so much he adopted my two sisters as his own and then his family also just drafted them in till today my sister is treated like a Gotora all because of my dad's big heart. My dad pampered me with affection and really believed in me and so I am thankful that he was my dad and a father figure to many and he LOVED with no reservation.
5. I am grateful for my two sunday school teachers Denise Gaisford and Diana Berwick who introduced me to a Jesus who could be my friend.I I got my first bible then after reciting 3 memory verses to Denise.I fell in love with the Bible then and couldn’t stop reading it. I enjoyed reading it so much that soon my fairytale books like Cinderella and Snow White then took second place to the Bible because it captured me and I was so busy memorising new memory verses so Denise and Diana could give me more Bible stickers to stick in my new Bible. . My love for the bible began at an early age because of these 2 awesome women. What stands out for me is that when I was baptised in the Holy Spirit in high school suddenly all the verses and stuff I knew about from the Bible were illuminated in my memory even though it had been so long!
6. I am grateful for the child evangelism and youth ministry initiatives that allowed me to grow in the Lord. I attended scripture union camps in junior school , Youth Encounter Camps after high school and attended 2 Avalanche camps by the Oasis Trust with Stephen Jack and my faith was shaped significantly. I was also disciplied in High school by the Pentecostal Assemblies Upper Room Youth Pastor Manuel Singano and Solo Chibs who came to my school every week to teach us the Word of God and spoke into my life in a significant way.
7. I am grateful for good health, fiercely loyal friends who pray for me, believe for me and fight for me.The type of friends God has blessed me with are like those in the book of Mark who made a hole in the roof just to make sure their paralysed friend got his breakthrough. I am grateful for the rich relationships and divine connections God has brought through my blogging and facebook posts.I am grateful for the men and women of God who speak into my life,instruct and cover me
8. I am grateful that I live in Zimbabwe, Africa. A very beautiful and peaceful country..
9.I am grateful for my job, it allows me to use my creativity and helps me learns so many new things.I also love the working environment.
10. I am thankful I was introduced to death at an early age. I am thankful I was in the mortuary/morgue identifying my sister's body in the same room with death and that I watched it be buried deep into the ground, so I would understand that this transition of experience and loss of life is an inevitable part of every story.
I am thankful for all the things I never wanted to experience. The things I cried out against, and the ones that have felt nothing but unfair. What I want is oftentimes not what I need in the first place, and it’s through these experiences, and not getting things my way, I’ve grown the most. I am thankful that my life is a beautiful mess, full of painful mistakes, falling but getting back up, crying some times but laughing hard most of it, hurting, forgiving, new friends, new experiences, many many chances to start over....I love my life Thank You Jesus.I am one really blessed woman‪#‎thanksgiving‬
"In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you- 1 Thessalonians 5:18 NKJV

Monday, November 10, 2014

In Pursuit of Purpose- My Tribute to Dr. Myles Munroe (April 20, 1954- November 9, 2014)


At a time when I wasn't exactly sure what direction my life was taking, an aunt recommended a book by Myles Munroe titled ‘ In Pursuit of Purpose’ and that book changed my life. Growing up I really wanted to be a lawyer, in fact I recall telling my dad when I was 9 that I wanted to be the next Attorney General. Life happened and my A level results did not qualify me to go to Law school and my hopes were dashed. I then didn't know what I wanted to be anymore, I would pay and enroll for many courses and not finish and I was clueless. Then I read Dr. Myles Munro’s book.

I took stock of my life and realised that I enjoyed reading and writing, better still every time I wrote something and published it online I always had a lot of positive feedback. I began to document and file all the feedback I was getting for my writing and then I knew God had used Dr. Myles Munroe to help me discover my purpose. From the feedback I was getting from my readers I was able to gather that most of the feedback was from the really broken and also from women and it was from there that my ministry to women was birthed.I would also get a lot of feedback from what I would write about Zimbabwe from people who also genuinely love Zimbabwe.

Now every time a woman writes to me telling me how much my story of a myriad of painful tragedies in my life have given them courage and they start pouring themselves out to me,I want to do more than pray for them, I want to be a solution. God give me the capacity to publish my works so that other lives may be inspired and find hope. God give me the capacity to build a shelter for vulnerable mothers who have no where to go and don't know where to start. Give me the capacity Lord that I don't just turn them into charity cases but help empower them and equip them to be able to fend for themselves. God I pray give me the capacity to be an agent of change and reformation and rebuilding of my country and continent. Every time I meet like minded people who want to rebuild Zimbabwe or who are Pan- Africanists my heart skips a beat because I really want to see this happen...

Lord at the at end of my life journey I want you to say to me exactly what you are saying to Dr. Myles Munroe right now“Well done good and faithful servant”

“I want to challenge everyone to go to the cemetery and disappoint the graveyard. Die like the Apostle Paul who said I have finished my course, I have kept the faith and I have been poured out like a drink offering. There is nothing left. I am ready to die. That’s how I wanna die because there is nothing else for me left to die,” he told the show’s host, Jeff Koinange. “When you die, die like I am planning to die. Empty. It’s finished,”- Dr. Myles Munroe

And I heard a voice from heaven saying unto me, Write, Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord from henceforth: Yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labours; and their works do follow them. Revelation 14:13

Monday, September 01, 2014

Do You Know What Season It Is?

“From Issachar's descendants there were 200 leaders who understood the times and knew what Israel should do. Their relatives were under their command.”- 1 Chronicles 12:32

I have come to realize that it is very important to know the season one is in. In the literal sense, when I know that it’s winter, I dress accordingly and only participate in activities that are conducive to that weather. Knowing the season also gives an understanding of what you should do. The advantage that the sons of Issachar had over everyone else is that that they did not just know the times/seasons but they knew what needed to be done. When the rainy season approaches the farmer gets ready to plant …it’s like that in our lives too.

In one season, God may just be telling you to sow but because you do not understand the season you may focus on trying to harvest. Some of us are doing the right things at the wrong time/season. For example, where you need to be stepping out and blossoming because it’s the summer of your life, you may enclose yourself because you think you are still in the winter season.

Step 1 - Know what season you are in
Step 2 - Know what is to be done in that season and 
Step 3 - Do what is supposed to be done in that season

These 3 steps will give you an advantage over anyone else who does not know what season it is, what needs to be done and does not do what needs to be done
You may wonder, “how do I know what season it is and what I should do?”. Stay in the word and prayer! Knowing your season will require you to stay in the Word of God and prayer like Daniel. 


Daniel chapter 9 reads: “In the first year of his reign, I, Daniel, learned from the Scriptures the number of years that Jerusalem would remain in ruins. The LORD had told the prophet Jeremiah that Jerusalem would remain in ruins for 70 years” 

Daniel had been studying the scriptures and discovered that the time/season for the end of Israel’s captivity had come. From that discovery, Daniel had a revelation that he needed to take the prophecy that Jeremiah had given 70 years before and use it to wage war in prayer so that Israel would be restored accordingly and he did just that.

God will speak to you about the season you are in if you spend time in the word of God and prayer consistently like Daniel did. Daniel knew the seasons and what needed to be done…and he actually ruled and served under 3 different government regimes!!!!!! Now thats HUGE!!!!


From the life of the sons of Issachar we learn that “Of the sons of Issachar, men who understood the times, with knowledge of what Israel should do, their chiefs were two hundred; and all their kinsmen were at their command (1 Chronicles 12:32).

Two hundred chiefs "who understood the times" held an entire tribe under their command. How? People will follow a person who has revelation. People will be drawn to anyone who walks with integrity in the Spirit of Wisdom and Revelation. What God did before, He wants to do again! Right here, right now, with YOU…
I am not preaching to you alone, I am preaching to myself too because I am just realizing that there are times I have been doing even the right thing but in the wrong season and times that I have known the season but  have not been clear on whats to be done and therefore done nothing in the end and as a result of that I have found myself  at the mercy of those who know the season and know what has to be done in that season and actually do what has to be done…


My prayer is that we would all know what season we are in so that we would know what we ought to do and do it well and so have dominion like the sons of Issachar and Daniel !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Pomegranates and Bells....

Your gifting and anointing can take you places but you need to bear the fruit of the Holy Spirit in order for God to be glorified in your gifts. Exodus 28:33-34 reads “And on its hem you shall make pomegranates of blue, and purple, and scarlet, all around its hem. And bells of gold shall be amidst them all around. There shall be a golden bell and a pomegranate, a golden bell and a pomegranate, upon the hem of the robe all around”.

God instructed that there should be bells and pomegranates all around the hem of the Priestly garments. The bells represent the 9  Charismatic Gifts and the pomegranates represent the 9 Fruit of the Spirit .The pomegranates made from cloth are there to cushion the noise that comes from the bells so that it’s not irritating. 

When we got born again and became God's 's royal priesthood, we received gifts from the Holy Spirit (bells) to wear but so that our gifts are not just clanging and empty sounds, God has given us the fruit of the Spirit (pomegranates) to balance our gifts. The nine fruit (note it’s not fruits) are components of the Fruit of the Holy Spirit. We need them because a fruit is not complete without all its components. 
The Hem of a Priestly garment with  Pomegranates and Bells


The Fruit are: “....love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faith, meekness, self-control; against such things there is no law” (Galatians 5:22).

When we operate in the gifts that we received from the Holy Spirit and cushion them with the fruit of the Holy Spirit which are equal to the number of gifts, we bring glory to God. 

Paul makes it clear in 1 Corinthians 13 that one may speak in tongues of men and angels but if one does not have love which is one of the nine components of the fruit of the Holy Spirit, then one becomes a sounding brass or clanging cymbal. God does not want us to be clanging cymbals through the gifts that the Holy Spirit gave us but desires for us to be effective and edify the body of Christ. The gifts we received are not for us to get puffed up or arrogant but they are for the body of Christ. 

If you want to see how disastrous operating in the gifts of the Holy Spirit without the Fruit of the Holy Spirit is, read the whole book of 1 Corinthians and see how a church that was blessed with the Gifts of the Spirit went chaotic without the fruit of the Holy Spirit. The fruit which is supposed to cushion the gifts, like the pomegranates were supposed to do to so that the  bells on the Priestly garments would not make noise in the Old Testament.

God works through the patterns and principles that are all set in the Old Testament. Here, the pattern and principle for how to operate in the gifts of the Holy Spirit has been set. So let him who has ears hear and he who has eyes see


Your character is more important than your charisma. Doesn't matter if you can "say it"...but can't live it." Nothing will draw nonbelievers and believers alike to the Lord than a truly sanctified saint in the Lord who is walking and operating in all 9 fruit of the Holy Spirit. If you are willing to allow the Holy Spirit to work and transmit all 9 of these fruit up into your personality to some appreciable degree in this life – you will then become a light that will literally radiate the presence of God Himself through your soul and personality. You have no idea how many people you will be able to save, touch, witness to, and help disciple if you have these fruit operating through you. 

These fruit will give you a credibility with God and with other people that no degree or title can give you in this life. This sanctification process is the ultimate, highest aim and goal with God for our lives. For those of you who are not afraid to let God begin this deeper sanctifying work in your life – keep these 9 fruit of the Holy Spirit directly in front of you – and work very closely with the Holy Spirit once He starts to manifest these fruit up into your personality.

These fruit will be coming directly from God. They will be His love, His goodness, His joy, and His peace that will start to flow into you. But you will still have to do your part in all of this. Once these divine attributes start to be released into your personality by the Holy Spirit – your job will then be to start to walk and operate in them.

Friday, July 11, 2014

GOD DOES HAVE SOMEONE FOR YOU!!!!!!


Talking from experience I have come to realize that God’s people often find it difficult meeting the right person to share their lives with. As the years go by they meet many people, but don’t seem to truly connect with anyone, and that can cause some alarm bells to go off. The perception that there is nobody out there that will be a suitable match, or that God does not intend for them to be married, can then easily get a foothold in their hearts.
However, God said in Gen 2:18: “It is not good for the man to live alone. I will make him a suitable companion”. This is a general statement made by God Himself, by which He declared that a man should have a wife (and by implication that a woman should have a husband). It is true that some people have a special gift to be single, like Paul said he had, but then those people will be content with their state of singleness. This gift of celibacy is very rare, and God gives it to people who have special callings in His kingdom, like Paul who was a traveling Evangelist. In Paul’s case having a wife and kids would have been very difficult, and for that purpose God gave him this special ability to be content with his singleness. However, if someone feels a desire to be united with another, then it is generally correct to believe that God intends for that person to be married. People who doubt that God has a suitable companion for them, but they feel a definite desire to have a spouse, should feel encouraged by this statement of God in Gen 2. If one truly desires not to be alone, then God wants to fulfill that desire. God is a loving father, and it is not in His character to put a desire in a person’s heart, and then take pleasure in torturing that person by withholding fulfillment of that desire.
The story of Adam and Eve in Gen 2 provides wonderful insight in how God intends to provide a spouse to every one of His children. The way God brought Eve into Adam’s life, illustrates general principles which we can learn from. Adam and Eve’s love story began by God’s declaration in Gen 2:18 that it is not good for the man to be alone, and that He Himself will make a plan to bring someone into Adam’s life. However, immediately after this declaration, the story seems to change. In verse 19 the Bible explains how God created all the animals, and brought them to Adam in order for him to name them all. At that point Adam already had a desire to have somebody, and although God promised a suitable companion, God didn’t bring Eve immediately into his life. Instead, God gave him a job to do first. God intended for Adam to have dominion over his environment. This is confirmed in Gen 1:26 where God said that He would make human beings, and that they would have power over the fish, birds and animals. I believe this says to us that God wants for a man to have his life under control, to be settled, mature, and stable in his ways, before he can have a wife. A basic need that every woman has, is to feel safe with her man. He must be able to provide security for her in many ways. For Adam, the journey to reach this point of dominion, was to name the animals. To modern men, maturity and dominion may mean different things, for instance to have a stable job and income, to be established as a man of God with principles, not to be selfish, etc. When a man is alone and cannot seem to find a partner, it may be a good thing for him to take a good look at his life and ask himself some tough questions. Questions like “Am I stable, mature, responsible, and a man of principle and values according to God’s will and intention for my life, or am I just drifting along????”
After Adam named the animals (or in our terms, grew up and became mature), the Bible says in verse 20 that Adam still didn’t find a suitable companion. That says something about him actively looking for someone special during the process he went through, but none of the animals were suitable to fulfill his needs, and that left him frustrated. In fact, Adam didn’t know what he was looking for, because up to that point (of his life) Adam had never seen a woman. He just knew he had a deep desire for someone special, but he couldn’t even define his own needs, because he had nobody or nothing as point of reference in order to understand his own desires. He longed for somebody, but he didn’t know exactly what she should be like. He also might have felt he has done everything God expected of him, and still nothing has happened. This is the frustration of many Christian men (and women). After they have walked in God’s ways, and have been obedient to His calling for them in this world, they still experience this emptiness, and don’t know how to resolve the problem. They may meet many people, but none seem to be compatible. Even when they are attracted to somebody on different levels, they still don’t seem to connect with that person in a way that their hearts truly desire. When a man (or a woman) feels this frustration, it is wise to go to God and acknowledge his or her dependence on Him to provide the right person. After all, He made the promise to bring someone suitable into their lives, which means He took that responsibility on Himself. It is important to understand that we do not depend on ourselves, and that without God’s intervention, the true connection we desire is not going to happen.
In verse 21 we see how God intervened. The verse says God caused Adam to fall into a deep sleep, and while he was sleeping, God did the unthinkable. He took a rib from Adam and formed a woman out of the rib. The sleep that Adam experienced implies a state of total rest. It is essential to reach a place of rest in God, and by doing that, we allow him to bring that suitable companion to us. We can frustrate ourselves tremendously in our own efforts to find the right partner, but God wants us to trust Him enough to go to sleep on the matter. However, to sleep on the matter does not mean being passive. One can only rest in God if one truly has faith that God will perform a miracle, but having faith also means to be attentive to the voice of God, and being ready to act when prompted by the Holy Spirit. When Samuel anointed Saul as king over Israel, he told him very specific things that God wanted Saul to know and what he should do, but at one point he simply said to him “…do whatever God leads you to do” (1 Sam 10:7). Samuel released Saul to act in faith when the moment for acting presented itself. If we can rest in Him, knowing He will fulfill His promise, then God normally starts working on our behalf, but at some point we will experience like Saul that God leads us to do something, and to reach out to somebody. We must keep our eyes on God and not on our goal to find a partner. When we do that, we will rest in Him, and then we will be able to distinguish His voice from other voices inside (like desperation, obsession and frustration), and as a result we will be able to move when God wants us to move. Until we feel God prompts us to act in faith to reach out to somebody, it is perfectly okay to meet new people, and to “scan the horizon” for that someone special, as long as we realize that we cannot depend on our own judgment. We have to be lead by God, and we have to wait on Him all the time.
Eventually the miracle happened for Adam - God brought Eve to him. In verse 23 Adam called out “At last, here is one of my own kind – bone taken from my bone and flesh from my flesh”. Adam was clearly very pleased with Eve. He didn’t know any woman before he met her, but the moment he met her, he recognized her as the one he was looking for. The reason was that God took her from something close to his heart (his rib). A man and woman should be connected at the level of their hearts more than anything else. Often God puts desires and dreams and likes and dislikes and gifts in a person’s heart. To truly connect with another, those same characteristics or at least an appreciation for those characteristics must be in the other person’s heart too. It is for instance impossible for a Christian to be truly united with a non-Christian, or to be united with someone with totally different dreams, values or lifestyle. Adam recognized Eve because she was like him. She was taken from him, and he recognized his own flesh and bone in her. A man and woman can only love one another deeply, if they can see a reflection of themselves in the other person. This does not necessarily mean two people must be exactly the same in every aspect, but it does mean that the other person must be able to value what they value, being able to share and understand their joy and sorrow, and support them in everything, and have common goals in life. There is a lot of truth in the saying that birds of the same feather, flock together. Don’t fall for someone with a heart totally different from your own.
The last thing worthy of mention regarding Adam and Eve’s love story, is found in verse 24 where the Bible says “… and they became one”. This is God’s heart for us. He wants for us to experience what it means to be fully united with another, to such extend that we act and live and think as if we are one. Total harmony between two people is only possible if God is involved in the relationship. Trust the promise of God. Believe that He has a suitable companion for you. Rest in Him. Allow Him to bring him into your life. He will not disappoint you.

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

QUALITIES TO LOOK FOR IN A GODLY MAN PART 2

In the intial post I covered Joseph as a model of an ideal godly husband I felt I needed to do a little more expounding on two more biblical models Abraham and Boaz (yes Boaz he's a gud guy)

First is Abraham, faithful Abraham, God’s friend. You know if Sarah had not offered Hagar to him, he most probably would never have impregnated another woman! And he had every means and every opportunity to. He was very wealthy. He could have any woman he wanted. But he practically worshipped the ground on which Sarah walked on, barren or not. When Sarah says jump, he says how high? (Lol!) Sarah says sleep with Hagar, he did. Sarah says Hagar insulted me, Abraham says “slap the insolence out of her (hahahahaha!!)”. This is Hagar who is pregnant with the child he has been waiting for all his life, yet because SARAH was not happy, he told her to treat Hagar anyway she wanted. The bible says he told Sarah – she is your maid, not my wife! Sarah says banish Hagar and her son, at first, he hesitated, then Sarah got God to back her up, he did! He just loved Sarah to bits. Abraham is rock solid faithful and dependable (well except for the time he lied that Sarah was his sister . He had every opportunity to forsake Sarah, especially after fathering Ishmael but he didn’t. He was stuck to her like everlasting super-glue. Oh.. are you still sitting reading this? You have not yet hit the floor and call forth your Abraham wherever he is? You know, most women don’t like their husbands talking with other women. But there are some women who can’t even stand the thought of their husbands being with someone else except them. Don’t worry. God feels you. He will provide you with your very own Abraham who will love you more than anything. Abraham will look at your ninety-year old body and still call you his sweet sixteen.

Next up is Boaz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Rth 2:1 And Naomi had a kinsman of her husband's, a mighty man of wealth, of the family of Elimelech; and his name was Boaz.  Rth 2:3 And she went, and came, and gleaned in the field after the reapers: and her hap was to light on a part of the field belonging unto Boaz, who was of the kindred of Elimelech.  Rth 2:11 And Boaz answered and said unto her, It hath fully been shewed me, all that thou hast done unto thy mother in law since the death of thine husband: and how thou hast left thy father and thy mother, and the land of thy nativity, and art come unto a people which thou knewest not heretofore.  Rth 2:12 The LORD recompense thy work, and a full reward be given thee of the LORD God of Israel, under whose wings thou art come to trust.  Rth 2:13 Then she said, Let me find favour in thy sight, my lord; for that thou hast comforted me, and for that thou hast spoken friendly unto thine handmaid, though I be not like unto one of thine handmaidens.  Rth 2:14 And Boaz said unto her, At mealtime come thou hither, and eat of the bread, and dip thy morsel in the vinegar. And she sat beside the reapers: and he reached her parched corn, and she did eat, and was sufficed, and left.  Rth 2:15 And when she was risen up to glean, Boaz commanded his young men, saying, Let her glean even among the sheaves, and reproach her not:  Rth 2:16 And let fall also some of the handfuls of purpose for her, and leave them, that she may glean them, and rebuke her not. 

What I love about this marriage is how God orchestrated their meeting and brought them together. In the first place, it would have been very awkward for Boaz, who is a very wealthy man, a man of stature and repute in the city to propose to a Moabite widow girl who just came into town (You know the Israelites can be very snobbish about preserving their culture and heritage! Mixed marriages were severely frowned upon). So now, Ruth went scavenging for food (Oh yes..Boaz found her hard at work, bent down in the most undignified position ever, picking up droppings of food from his field. He didn’t see her in a designer suit and heels, make-up all done, everything in place. He found her at work in his fields looking for food and from that minute, the Spirit of God started moving. God showed me a sneak preview of what happened here. Do you remember how Adam started blessing Eve the moment he set eyes on her? Come on now! That was exactly what happened when Boaz set his eyes on Ruth. If you read from Ruth 2: 8-13, oh..the guy prayed and blessed Ruth as if he was the chief priest himself! Secondly, Boaz happened to be a kinsman to Elimelech, so by law, he is actually doing a good deed and preserving the seed of the dead by marrying Ruth. End of story! The story of Boaz and Ruth has a very important significance especially for women who have moved to trust God in one way or the other. By so doing, they honoured God and God will surely move and honour them in a biggest way possible! Ruth trusted in a God that seemed to have abandoned her mother-in-law. She left her familiar surroundings and followed her mother-in-law to unfamiliar terrain. The minute she told her mother-in-law in Ruth1: 16 – 17 “ Entreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God: Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the LORD do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me"; God was stirred up and He went ahead of her and prepared a place for her in Boaz’s home. All she went out to look for was food for herself and her mother-in-law. She came back married to probably the wealthiest man in town! (OK OK..it didn’t exactly happen that fast, but you get my drift

Now just to sober up a bit .From the way I have analysed the story of Ruth and Boaz , modern day women mistake the fact that Ruth went to lie at Boaz's feet for stepping up to a guy and asking him out and thats not it. Naomi advised Ruth to do what she did because Boaz had already shown special interest in Ruth right from day one!!!! From the moment Boaz sets his eyes on Ruth he already begin to enquire "Whose damsel is this?" and I mean in his first conversation he is blessing Ruth as though he was the Chief Priest himself. He further on offers to provide food for Ruth, protection from young men in the fields and even goes a step further to instruct his men to drop "handfuls of purpose" for her to glean thats too much kindness from a stranger if you ask me that in itself is a clear sign that Boaz made the first move!!!!A modern day scenario would be a Brother shows interests in a girl, makes a few enquiries, asks for her number, initiates conversations with her on chat, watsapp and asks too spend time with her, and even shares some personal stuff about himself , in thats case a modern day sister can then tactfully play Ruth and ask the brother what his intentions are is he is dragging his feet and yet at the same time hogging hertime and attention.

So sisters who are getting ready to land a Boaz, heed Naomi’s advice ‘Wash and perfume yourself. Pimp yourself up and get a makeover or something and change your look and then go to the threshing floor where Boaz lies. The threshing floor becomes symbolic of a place where we deal with our flesh or sinful nature. It is a place where the chaff gets separated from the wheat. It is here we pray and cry out to the Lord for help or where we repent and determine to get victory over the sinful nature…and so that means the place of prayer is where Boaz is so lets get fasting and praying!!!!.And remember, we are not to go out looking for him ourselves physically. Our duty here is search the scriptures diligently, make a list, tender it before God and leave the rest up to Him. He will position us in such a way that it will be a perfect work....I await to hear testimonies from you sisters coz I see plenty wedding testimonies....

QUALITIES TO LOOK FOR IN A GODLY MAN- PART 1

Hello Single ladies I just thought I'd share something based on a teaching I came across a couple years back...I have personalised it and also added a bit of my own stuff but I pray that y'all be blessed.

I am believing God for a man like Mary’s husband – Joseph who the bible calls a just man. In those days in Israel, under the Mosaic Law, if a girl was found pregnant and was not married, she would be stoned to death and her family would be put to shame. So when Joseph found out Mary was pregnant, he was supposed to run screaming to the priests. But he just decided within himself to break off their engagement quietly so no one would find out. As he was contemplating the best way he would do this, God’s angel spoke to Him in a dream and told him 'do not be afraid to take Mary to be your wife, what she is carrying was conceived of the Holy Spirit'. Joseph obeyed God and offered love and kindness to Mary without thinking twice! He proved to be a man of men, strong and dependable. He stood as a father, brother, caregiver and a husband for both Mary and her unborn child.

Looking at Joseph with new eyes, I have a witness in my spirit that every single woman who has an issue she wants/ needs covering for should have Joseph listed at the very top of her list not a Tall,Dark, Rich and Handsome. Every woman who has a past, or an issue and needs a husband-defender. Because Joseph will listen to God’s voice and protect me. Joseph will stay with me and take me to my place of birthing of God's purpose (my bethlehem)and help deliver Jesus who he did not father and give what I have a birthed a name and identity. Joseph will wait till I have fulfilled God’s will (giving birth to Jesus) before asking for his own needs to be met.My prayer night and day is " Lord, like you found Joseph for Mary, who stood by her and protected her from untimely death and covered her up, I ask and trust that you will also provide a Joseph for me as well". Joseph is kind, gentle; strong and dependable. He is a provider and he is matured to a very high degree. Joseph has got a very healthy dose of self-control. According to bible history in Matthew, he did not touch Mary sexually until she had weaned Jesus

So dear sister, whip out your bible and go looking for a husband between those pages. Who says you can’t find a husband in the bible? Every book of the bible must have one. If you want a King, pick your choice from David, Solomon, King Ahasuerus (Esther’s husband). If you want a wise man, you can have your pick from King Solomon, Daniel, Paul, Abraham, Jacob. If you want a father, brother, friend and husband all-in-one, pick Joseph. If you want your husband to pant after your love, pick from Abraham and Jacob. If you want a strong man, Joshua and Caleb. The list is exhaustive. You can make it as long as you want. Start from Genesis down to Revelations. Ask the Holy Spirit to help as you search the scriptures regarding this very important part of your life.

And remember, we are not to go out looking for him ourselves physically. Our duty here is search the scriptures diligently, make a list, tender it before God and leave the rest up to Him. He will position us in such a way that it will be a perfect work. Look at what He did for Ruth..my goodness! She wasn’t dressed to impress or anything, she was just going about her own business, looking for what to eat.

Saturday, June 21, 2014

The Grace on my life....

But by the grace of God I am what I am- 

1 Corinthians 15:10



From as far as I can remember even as a little girl the grace of God has always been on my life in such a distinct way. It has been so distinct that it resulted in me being misunderstood and rejected by family and friends and left me apologetic for its presence in my life. By the end of my first term of first grade I had taught myself to read and I  read an entire high school novel and narrated the whole story in the novel to my parents who were shocked at my abilities. By second grade I was reading newspapers with my dad and he liked to move around with me showing off that his 7 year old could read a newspaper. By the time I was in third grade teachers marvelled at my reading abilities.I still have my report cards which say that at the age of 8 I actually read like a 13 year old! I was top of the class; on the few occasions I came second  was inconsolable. I excelled in swimming, hockey and athletics and drama and arts. My dad would not stop talking about my achievements and blatantly expressed his preference for me over my siblings. Even when my other siblings did well according to their abilities he would not really make noise about it as he did for me his 'genious' as he called me. By the time I was in 4th grade I knew that in 7th grade I was going to be appointed headgirl and I told my parents. Truly 3 years later I was appointed headgirl as I had predicted in my presumption and arrogance .
A divine moment with Dr. Juanita Bynum and myself 


The definition of grace has been summed up by bible scholars to be 'unmerited favour' this is whereby things that you haven't earned happen and grace is also that which takes you to places you know that you do not qualify to be. Grace is taken from the Greek word Charis. Grace is what God bestows on a person in spite of their deeds, background or qualifications.And Grace is what has always set me apart from my siblings and friends. Grace is what caused my dad's nephew the late Vice-President of Zimbabwe Joseph Msika to take me on on a day trip in the helicopter with other cabinet members. I was in high school then and he called my dad to say he wanted to take his mum (me) along with him to see him at work. I have sat and mixed with high profile politicians; even eaten what they ate as well and I was only 15 or 16 I think. I have rode in the presidential motorcade with the same late Vice President  and that has also caused jealousy even among grown up relatives who wanted the same honour. What baffled me then is that when I rode in the Presidential motorcade I was with my other cousin but it seems it was  just me that these relatives did not want to see in the motorcade.Some even insinuated that I would ask him to single me out but because of the grace on my life I didn't have to try hard because my son Joseph Msika loved me and respected me as his maternal aunt. I even became apologetic and would go and sit in the background at his family functions to avoid the outrage but he would still single me out and take me to the high table and shout at them saying "why are you seating her with the commoners when she is my mother." When I went on the trip I had all the other ministers calling me "Amai" as well and being respectful to me because of who had brought me there, that's what the Grace of God does. I have been privileged to sit and talk to some of the national heroes of this great country because of this Grace. 

Grace is what happened last year when a 31 year old girlfriend of mine made into the Zimbabwean government as the youngest Deputy minister and she was invited to be a Guest of Honour at our Old School and asked me to come with her. Grace is the fact that because I attended the function with her I had access to the same privileges with her . Grace is the fact that in her speech she asked me and our other friends to stand as she introduced us and explained the history of  our friendship. I didn't ask her to introduce me neither did I ask to be a VIP it was Grace that got me there. 

When there is a grace on your life even in your winter seasons God will raise mere strangers to provide for you. I have attended a prayer meeting looking so good and then been approached by an elderly lady that she wants to bless me with shoes and gotten the shoes. I have also sat in the front row at a church meeting and the person delivering the Offering message  has also given me a pair of shoes right in front of the whole meeting. When the Grace of God is on your life even when you have no money in your bag God will cause believers to go and empty their wardrobes and dress you like a queen without you having to ask them. It has happened to me unexpectedly so many times that people would have been shocked to hear that the well dressed Taffy has no coin to her name!

When there is a grace on your life ordinary people will not see it but anointed men and women will see it and acknowledge it blatantly. On many occasions I have been singled out by someone who is ministering and received powerful prophecies on my life even when my life has appeared to be contrary to the prophecy. I have had direct access to some phenomenal men and women of God who have spoken into my life, with some taking me under their wings; leaving many to marvel how on earth I have such access but all I can say is its nothing to do with me , its the Grace.

Because of the Grace I joined a mega-church where it was a bit difficult to be visible but in 3 months I got an award at the Young Adults Ministry for my writing! The award blew me away and I knew it wasn't  for me so I gave it as seed to the Women's Ministry Head who was mentoring me and she prayed a blessing on me and double portion of her anointing. As a result of that award which I gave away to that Pastor , my ministry to women has been amplified. A friend asked me to join her and few ladies on the Facebook platform where they have a Proverbs 31 group with a membership of 25 751 members from all over the world and when I post the responses and feedback I get from the ladies is overwhelming but I know that it is not because of me its the Grace so I just say " Not to us LORD, not to us but to your name be the glory."Psalm 115:1

Although I know that the favour on my life has nothing to do with me or my works but the blood of Jesus I am no longer apologetic- I am what I am by the Grace of God period. I have learnt that it is not humility to downgrade and not acknowledge who God has made you to be, neither is it humility to not to accept compliments.  As C.S. Lewis said and I quote "True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less"

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

What women expect from men in general (My thoughts)

Contrary to what most men believe women are not very complicated.While some particulars may vary from woman to woman, most things women expect from men are virtually universal. We learn how men in relationship ought to treat women from our fathers, favourite uncles, neighbours and Pastors and not forgetting Enid Blyton's fairytales and Hollywood, Bollywood, Nollywood and all these other woods movies.

More than anything the man in the relationship is a man who know his purpose and vision and doing something about it.While most women aren't necessarily looking to marry a millionaire, she does want to know that you have a good work ethic and that you have at least some ambition to improve yourself. Whether it's taking a class to advance your career or reading books that will improve your mind, women love men who aren't content to just always sit in front of the tube or hang with their friends. They want a man who actually shows a desire to improve his life and possibly their life together. The man must be able to articulate his vision clearly even before it has materialised and he openly and willingly shares his dream with the woman in the relationship even if she is not directly involved. She is his best ally and cheerleader and even if she is not directly involved she knows the dream and does what she can to support , whether its baking a cake for the team who is running with her man's vision or offering to arrange flowers for the office reception. So the man in the relationship must have a vision and be willing to include the woman he is with. Share your dreams with us and we'll pray for you, encourage you when you are down and we'll stand with you when all else fails

One area where time and time again man fail in relationships and this is in the area of passivity and this can tracked down to Adam in the bible. Women want men who will not only provide for them but protect them and speak for them. The man in a relationship has an obligation to defend his woman to his mother, his sister, his friends and even hers too. It hurts us and devastates us when men remain silent when we are in a situation . This does not mean that we expect you to always come to our rescue but we do want to be assured that if we need your help and support you will be there.

Another often neglected but very important area neglected by man in relationships is praying together with you partner. There is an adage that says "a family that prays together stays together ", it is so with relationships. Share your faith and be your partner's encouragement and spiritual covering. The man in a relationship must have dealt or be willing to deal with his childhood wounds so that there is harmony in his relationship.

Every man in a relationship must be comfortable with showing affection and attention to his partner.Speaking of affection, most women adore sudden public displays. We're not talking about mauling her in a supermarket, but giving her a warm, affectionate kiss on the cheek or lips, telling her you love her (once you've reached that stage of your relationship) once in a while, or holding her hand as you walk down the street. These are all loving acts that when done in public will usually be reciprocated ten-fold in private by her if you are married.

Women expect the man in the relationship to open doors, pull out our chairs and treat us us with royalty we expect you to provide, protect us, pray for us and love us as we are.We expect the man in the relationship to take charge without taking over or being bossy ..we expect the man in the relationship to listen to us when we want to vent .You see, it's not the grand gestures that most women want. It's the little things that tell her that she's chosen a great guy. Don’t believe what you see in TV sitcoms and magazine advertisements, telling you that you need to be tall, dark and handsome to be what a woman wants. It’s just not true. Women want you to be the the man for THEM, that is what they fall in love with.

Celebrating My Father- Fanwell James Gotora 9 June 1936- 4 May 2005




Every  4th of May and Father's day  I celebrate a life well lived as I pay tribute to my hero, my superman and the man who I called Father. Fanwell James Gotora was born on the 9th of June in 1936 to “Mhasvi James Kachedzi Gotora and Susan Muswewembudzi Zowa in the Village of Nyariri Gotora in a pole –dagga hut” as I accurately quote from one of his journals. He was the oldest child in a family of 5 boys and 1 girl who named me Lillian after herself when I was born. Dad also wrote in his journal that he did have another sister who only lived for 8 months.
Although my dad was a very bright student he only went as far as Standard 6 which is the equivalent of ZJC or form 2 and immediately attended Chibero Agricultural College because he had to send his 5 other siblings to school. Dad would later excel as farm assistant (that’s what they called them in colonial Rhodesia to a Farm Manager in the Zimbabwe Era. He was sought after and head hunted by commercial farmers because of his hard work and expertise. Dad was so passionate about farming he even consulted for free!!! 



Another great passion my dad had was politics. He collected books on different political subjects, macro-economics and personal biographies of world leaders and enjoyed political debates with me and other likeminded people. Dad was generally knowledgeable on many subjects and even though he was not so well educated he attracted highly educated friends, His best friend was Barclays Bank First Street branch Manager and they really got on well and clicked on all levels. I believe my love for reading was inherited from him and even the writing part because he wrote about the accounts of his life in many journals which I was reading over and over again today.



Although dad spend his working week in shorts and getting around the farm on a motor bike , Dad was a flamboyant man who loved to dress up in designer suits, remember how my mum and my young brother struggled to choose the suit that we were going to bury him in because the man had a great collection!!!Dad also enjoyed dining at nice places with his family, and even though it was new to him he quickly learned the importance and attended important sports and games and school activities that my brother and I took part in. 



A quality that my dad will always be remembered for is my dad’s generosity, because he had had to drop out of school, dad was very sympathetic to other people being denied the opportunity to go to school so he sent some of his brothers’ children, cousins’ children to school and assisted many people. He sponsored burials and bought groceries at many funerals and always stood by his family and extended family actually in his eyes there was no such thing as extended family, family was just family to him. My dad also celebrated people and their successes, He would panic when it was my birthday because he always celebrated me and was an extravagant giver. On my 21st he couldn’t find a key so he bought me a designer silver watch instead. When his nephew the late former Vice President Joseph Msika first became a senior cabinet minister Dad was over the moon and mobilized people to contribute but he footed most of the bill and had a cow slaughtered for a party to celebrate Joseph Msika’s success at the village. Even though none of my dad’s children had a white wedding in his lifetime and only 1 graduated with a degree my dad never stopped celebrating other people’s children who excelled in that area, he even organized parties for many of then. I remember when I was teenager I took him to task about certain people he had helped and who had never bothered to thank him or acknowledged him and his gentle reply was that not up to them to thank me or repay me that’s up to God.



Another quality about my dad that I will always remember is he LOVED without reservation. He had many tetes (paternal aunts) and he loved their children- all his nephews and nieces from the Mandikis, Zambes,Dakas, Msikas, Mudarikis, Midzis, and many more and they equally loved him back. In our culture an uncle from the maternal side is equated to one’s mothers and so these nephews and nieces, most who were older than my charming dad doted on their Sekuru Fanwell and submitted to him.  If he summoned them to the farm they would drive from Harare or wherever they were to come and hear what he needed even if he wanted to send them on an errand.